Digital Transgender Archive

Interview with Venus DeMars part 1

Venus de Mars was born in 1960 and grew up as a closeted trans kid, describing herself as a “little boy with a secret.” She didn’t grow up female since she was assigned male at birth but feels completely female now as a trans female. She grew up in Duluth, Minnesota with one older sister. She was bullied in school every now and then but sidestepped a lot of it by becoming a good negotiator and choosing the right friends. She remembers wearing her sister’s petticoat and cross dressing her Barbie and Ken. She began to develop breasts because of a delay in testosterone during puberty, but the hormone soon took over and they went away. She kept quiet for years about her identity, but the feelings of wanting to present femininity in her identity wouldn’t go away. She married in the early 1980s, confident those feelings would disappear. She became depressed, however, threatening her marriage. The couple began going to marriage counseling and then individual counseling. In counseling she was able to break through and admit her trans identity. Her counselor found her a crossdressers support group called CLCC, City of Lakes Crossdressers Community. She became suicidal, realizing she had to tell her wife. Once she came out to her wife as a crossdresser though, she was supportive, and they’re still married 34 years later. They attended CLCC together, and de Mars became an officer for them and made art for the newsletter. De Mars had two nose feminization surgeries and started hormone therapy. De Mars is publicly out as a trans activist and is a professional musician, touring all around the world. She even has her own documentary called Venus of Mars. She talks about her career as a musician in this interview, and she is currently writing her memoir.